Why you May Feel More Comfortable in a Full Space
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Welcome to episode 42 of Permission to be Messy. I'm your host, JoAnn Krall and today I'm talking about why you may feel more comfortable in a full space.There's been a lot of talk about minimalism in the past years and so many people believe that if you are a minimalist and you strive to be a minimalist, everything is going to be better. But honestly, there are many people that would feel so uncomfortable in an empty space.
And today I'm going to talk about why that is. And I'm also going to talk about when it's taken to an extreme, not so much a hoarding extreme, but when there's a lot of stuff how it can be detrimental.
So the first thing I want to talk about is that comfort and security. Many people who prefer a fuller space find comfort in the sense of having things surrounding them. It creates a cozy and nurturing atmosphere for them and helps them feel more at ease. Now, the negative of this is really when it borders over into a hoarding situation where people are burying themselves in stuff, closing the walls in on themselves so that they feel secure. So I'm not talking about that.
I'm talking about the people that really like to have things around them. Things make them happy. They just feel more secure when things are less empty and it makes sense, right? Because when we're in a room that has nothing in it, it echoes and it feels just, it just feels cold sometimes. On the flip side of that, some people really thrive in that environment.
So really think about yourself. Are you somebody that likes to have a lot of things around them? Very little or somewhere in between.
Often people who prefer a fuller space, it may be that they have a strong attachment to their possessions. They find sentimental value in their belongings. And that makes it really hard for them to let go of things. And really there's nothing wrong with that. As long as those are bringing up good feelings.
So sometimes we will attach a sentimental value to something and it may be in a negative way. It's not necessarily our sentiment. It might be the sentiment of other people who owned the items before. That they really loved it, but you don't and you feel guilt. So think about the things that you're holding onto for sentimental value. Make sure that those things bring you joy and that you're honoring them.
I've talked about this before, when you're holding onto things. If you're displaying them in a way that feels comfortable for you and, you're not just tossing them in a box then. it's good. sometimes just having those things around us is it's like being wrapped up in a warm blanket.
Another reason people want things around them is really for decorative and aesthetic appeal. A fuller space can have more appeal to some people who appreciate a really rich visual and decorated environment. They may enjoy again, that warmth in that homeyness of the fuller space that provides. I personally am somebody that prefers less stuff that brings me comfort.
But what I've learned over the years is that my daughters. they don't necessarily want a fuller space, but they want more than me. So it's like striking that balance of having enough in a room to make it feel cozy but for it to not feel cluttered for me, So this is another thing. thinking about your family members.
This can be such a point of contention when one person wants less stuff and the other person wants more. We really need to learn to strike that balance. And sometimes it could just be a room by room thing. If the person who really needs things, minimalistic let them have a space that they can go to feel like they can breathe. Because that's exactly what comes to mind when I think about this for me, when I'm in a space that has a lot of visual stuff, knickknacks and decorations I get overwhelmed. and I need that clear space. So really be mindful of that. If you're sharing a space with family members, maybe have a conversation about the whole thing, just talk about how things make you feel. That can be a huge step towards making those compromises.
And another point I want to make is about personal expression. A fuller space can really help some individuals express their personality in their interest and their creativity. It allows them to display their collections, their artwork, and their personal touches. This is really important for some people.
So don't ever feel bad if this is you and you need your stuff displayed and around. And if someone comes in and they're like, ah, how do you live like this? Just take a breath and realize that. It's just not their personal preference and there's absolutely nothing wrong with you.
Now, one thing I want to talk about though, is the potential challenges. If this is yourself, if you've resonate with this, that you'd like to have a lot of stuff around. Be aware of the potential challenges. I always say, let go of as much as you possibly can and really what that means when I say as much as you possibly can. It's what makes you feel comfortable. It's not oh, you have to make these decisions between things that you love,just to reduce things. It's getting to the point where everything you have, you either need her love. And that you're honoring everything that you love and that you're using everything that you need.
So it's making sure that there isn't extraneous stuff around just to have it around. And some of those things could be sentimental items. Some of those things could just be things that when you have a really full space you may not see everything. So if you look at a space, there may be some things that you were like, you know what I can let go of that.
One tip. I've given to a friend and if you're listening, Mia, I love this when this came up, talking about, all the chotchkies, She loved to have her chotchkies around her but she felt like there was so much and so I told her, maybe try rotating those items so that you're not letting go of them, but they're not all in your space at one point.
So like she liked to have them at her desk and in her office. Okay, let's maybe do it seasonally, just, swap things out and that can help. We talk about this often with children and their toys, they get bored with their toys over time. And so sometimes packing up a bunch of them and putting them away for six months and then pulling them out six months later, it all feels new to them.
So that may work for you as well. If you have just so much stuff that you don't want to let go of and you love to display it, think about displaying things, seasonally.
What I want to leave you with today is if you are a person that loves to have stuff around you. Just know that if you're listening to people saying, you need to declutter, you need to get rid of stuff. If it's external voices, you know, you're watching TV shows or you're reading books or things like that. Know, that there's nothing wrong with you holding onto stuff.
Just make sure that it isn't being detrimental to you. Not being able to find things, not being able to clean. Anything that would be disrupting you on a daily basis.
And again, if it's a family member that is being frustrated by it, think about different spaces where you can express yourself and you can go to feel comfortable and vice versa. If they're more minimalist, they have a space that they can go to.
Finding a balance that works for you and your lifestyle is key to creating a comfortable and functional living environment. That's really what it boils down to. So finding your comfort level.
And this really is what permission to be messy is about. It's not so much that your stuff all around you is messy. It's just permission to be yourself.
And really quickly, I want to point out if you head to the show notes, there's going to be some links. About offerings that I have, this is a great time to get organized, even though it doesn't feel like it, but right before the holidays, if you can, make some space for your holiday decorations and your holiday gatherings, I encourage you to check out the links I have. multiple offers that may be of interest to you.
And as always, I'm wishing you much progress, peace, purpose and the permission to be messy. Thanks for listening.
