24: What To Do When You Can't Focus
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Welcome to episode 24 of Permission to be Messy. I'm your host, JoAnn Krall and today I'm talking about what you can do when you can't focus. Now I have a list of things that you can do but the reason why I'm recording this is because most of these things don't work for me. When you Google. How can I help with focus? How can I clear my head? You're going to hear a lot of these terms.
And you may be thinking I still can't focus. You're not alone. It could be that you have ADHD, but it could also be other things.
Okay, so let's dive into the list. The first thing is practicing mindfulness and doing meditation. Now. I love to meditate. I do feel like it relaxes me.
But for me to sit and say, oh, I'm just going to meditate. And then I'll magically be able to focus. It doesn't work for me. if it works for you, I'd love to hear about that. but I have not found many people who this has been successful for them. I feel like it's a talking point for people.
It's kind of like change your mindset. That's a term that people love to throw around. Some people actually have some good actionable steps behind it. But not everybody does. So be wary of that. okay.
The second thing is physical activity. This is a great one for clearing your head. although for myself, when I'm walking, I don't clear my head. My head ends up being filled with a million thoughts. And I can't write them down, so it can be a little bit stressful for me. So when I'm walking, I have to be listening to something to take my mind off of all of the thoughts so that I can then focus. Sometimes I will go for a walk. to get the creative juices flowing. And if the focus is around needing to be creative, then it is definitely helpful. but really I'm just procrastinating when I'm going off to move and do something, but I guess sometimes the change of scenery will help. but again, it depends on why you can't focus.
The third thing is to disconnect from tech. That's great unless what you're trying to focus on is something that you need to do on your computer or your phone. That is a healthy thing for us to do, to have some time away from our technology.
But as far as full on let's focus, The piece that I will say about that is limiting your notifications. So if your phone is dinging, your computer's dinging, you're getting a billion pop-ups here and there. Definitely think about that because that will help you focus if you're not having those distractions Distractionsare basically the number one thing that, prevents me from being focused.
Number four, spend time in nature. I already talked about walking. I'm not a huge fan of nature. It depends on the nature. if I had a beach beside me, I really think that would help me.
and I do, I, obviously I live on the east coast and there are beaches, but I can't just walk out my door and go to the beach. for me, like walking through a wooded area, summertime's not great maybe in the fall and the winter, a little bit nicer because the less buggy.
But, One thing I will say about that is. I know it's very woo, but I have been hearing from more and more people that I need to be grounded. So I think I do need to step out onto the grass more and ground myself. That's a topic for a future episode.
I'm actually going to do an experiment and see if it helps because. My ability to focus. Is really being challenged. So if that is something that I can do and it helps. I'm going to report back and let you know.
The fifth thing is to journal. this is really about clearing your mind. On this point. I know so many people that journaling helps them with many different areas of their life. I've tried journaling over and over again. And I, you know, I go gangbusters for a few days and then I stop. But one thing I think I take from journaling is doing that. Doing a brain dump. I consider that journaling, cause I'm just free writing everything that's in my brain and getting it out.
Doing that brain dump is probably the most successful thing in helping me focus.
The sixth thing is to do some creative activities. I guess this maybe just rewires your brain. If you're doing something that you really love to me to me, that's a distraction of what I'm supposed to be doing. I could take some time and go off and do something creative but then I'm thinking about the thing that I'm supposed to be doing. So for me under this section of create creative activities, I would have to say that music really helps me focus. There are times when I need complete silence. But then there were other times where music really helps drive me.
Depends on the tasks that I'm doing. Not everybody likes to have sound around them. or some people like to hear like classical music, so there's no lyrics to distract them, but other people, they want to hear it loud music with lyrics and it just, it helps
and some people like even having TV noise background, I know other people that they can't focus when they're alone, they need to be at a coffee shop and they need to hear all the bustling around them. for me, if I was in a coffee shop, I'd be people watching the whole time and I wouldn't be getting anything done.
Number seven is deep breathing, just like meditation. I've tried it. I love deep breathing. It helps me relax at night. But it hasn't really helped me during a task. I've seen so many people mentioned this, so it must be working for someone. So if it's working for you, let me know.
Number eight is something I hear all the time. It's to me, this, people saying you just need self care. I think that to me feels very much like you just need a mind shift. You need to shift your mindset. Self care, all of these things on this list are self care. And then there are many other things it's really how we define it. So I guess if you know what self care is for you.
And you think it may help you focus? Give it a try.
And then the ninth thing. is seek support. I think this more applies to people who,are struggling, truly struggling with ADHD, needing an ADHD specialist. Maybe you've got a lot on your mind. and you need a therapist or a trusted friend to talk through things.
But for me doing that brain dump is very cathartic and it gets it all out of my head. And then if there's something that's nagging on me, then I know, I can talk to somebody about it, but it's almost like that brain dump brings clarity to everything. It shows the importance. It shows us all the things that we're thinking about. That really aren't that important. We can just get them out on paper and get them done. Or things that really are important. It sheds light on so much.
As I was thinking about this episode, and I was thinking about this list, which I've seen, hundreds of times over in different variations. And there's probably other things out there.
My ability to focus is really based on being alone. I'm currently recording this nobody's home. I know that I'm not going to be interrupted. And for me, that's everything. So for years,when I retired and started working for myself and I would be doing work at home, my husband was at his job and my daughters were at school, so I had a good I want to say six hours every day that it was just me and the dog dogs. Don't dogs. Don't really talk too much. Some do. but they're not as much as a distraction. if anything, they help you, take those breaks. But I could focus. I was alone and it quiet. And on those days that I wanted to blare the music, I could blare the music in the times that I wanted complete silence. I could have that.
That's all I needed. That's really all I needed. And of course my brain dumps, cause I've been doing those for years before anybody I think ever used that term. I've always just written down everything that I needed to think of. And, I'm sure I have mentioned this before, but since the pandemic, my ability to focus. Has just been, stripped away from me because everybody's been home all the time and I've had very few moments. I can probably say I have less than a full day, a full 24 hours in that entire three, four year, wherever we're at now period.
Where I've had alone time and be able to focus. I've gone into my car for that. But it's just something different about being able to be in your own space in your own office, in your own room. Just having that quiet. To actually sit, look at something and not be distracted.
I guess what it all boils down to it is distractions. And so if meditating helps you get things out of your brain, your brain's distracting, you. Do it, if it's physical activity, do it. and go down the list, try everything. Cause I, This is a great list.
Doesn't mean that every single thing on this list is going to work for you. It may mean that not anything on this list is going to work for you. I wouldn't even need this list if I had this much alone time all the time. I know. for me, it's setting boundaries and, I can only set so many boundaries because my, my family knows that I need alone time, but they're here. And so they may, they just their presence, even if they're not talking to me, just their presence.
and I think it's probably because being a mom, when you're a mom, everybody's mom, where's this mom where's that. And even my husband does. To me, there's always that one person in the family that knows where everything is. and it's not always the mom, In my case, it is, I am that person.
And I think that, it's like I have to constantly remind, don't ask me, don't interrupt me. Don't ask me. But it's just knowing that they might do it, but they might forget. And so it's really hard to just sit and focus
So let me know. I would love to hear from you, if you struggle with focus. I've said this in the beginning that I want to have people on talking about ADHD because I've got a lot of different resources. People who struggle with it people who help people with it. so I really want to get these conversations going. If you do struggle with focus, reach out to me, let me know. I'd love to hear what your challenges are, what you'd like to hear more about.
So my contact information is in the show notes. you can connect with me on your favorite social media platform and message me there. You can, send me an email. You can send me a voice note right on my website. I just love to hear from you. If there's anything specific you'd like to, have me cover in upcoming episodes, I am by no means an ADHD expert and that's why I. Love gathering information from my people who are,and I also love gathering information from people who have ADHD, because that's where you get the real insight is from the people who struggle with it. And as I released this, episode, it'll be on July 4th. So for those of you in the United States, I'm wishing you a happy 4th of July, and if you listen to last week's episode, I'm changing my little outro here. let me try this new one. I'm wishing you much purpose peace and progress and of course the permission to be messy. Thanks for listening.